I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Randomize
