Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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