Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
