i would punch a child for taco bell
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
