Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
