I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
