Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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