I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
