do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
