drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
