You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
