do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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