how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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