Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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