so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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