he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
