so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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