we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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