with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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