is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
