If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
