She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
