i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
