Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
