Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize