Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Barsexuality is the new black.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
