Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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