Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
