Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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