wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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