i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I will die if light touches me.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
