You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
