i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize