"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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