ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
