i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
