Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
