I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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