I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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