i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
