Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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