If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
My vagina just clenched in fear
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
