All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
