I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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