i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
