butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
