WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
