winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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