also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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