Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
